hey there. welcome to my blog. i'm Claire and i'm 16. i'm a positive person. i love owl city and all time low but the majority of the stuff on here is ridiculous shit that i find funny. hopefully you find it funny too. enjoy your stay.
Luigi

horror movie opening scene

white girl:i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.
white boy:come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.
white girl:you're just trying to scare me.
white boy:lmao
they continue walking for a few seconds
*white couple hears noise*
white girl:babe what that??
white boy:i'll go investigate
*leaves her alone*
*choking noises*
white girl:zack!!!
white boy:ha ha just kidding!
white girl:asshole!
white boy:im just playin babe
white girl:that wasnt funny but ur still cute
*playful kiss*
*things turn sexy*
*hear noise*
white boy:i'll go investigate
*he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*
*maybe a thud*
white girl:zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!
*she walks and he dead*
white girl:ahhh!!
*killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*
white girl:ahhh!!!
*white girl runs*
*dead end*
*hides*
*thinks she free n safe*
*guy catches her*
*cuts her*
*she dead*
opening title slashes across screen:BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D
Notes
44395
Posted
58 minutes ago
heterhoesexual:

when your mom asks what your plans are for the weekend

heterhoesexual:

when your mom asks what your plans are for the weekend

(via ifmyheartwasacompassyoudbenorth)

Notes
3454
Posted
11 hours ago

dajo42:

"tea is just leaf water!" "yeah well coffee is just bean water!" wow, it’s. it’s like everything is made of things. this door is just wood rectangle. this poster is just ink paper. this lemonade is just lemon water. wow, it’s like you can combine ingredients to make things that are more enjoyable than the initial parts of the equation. sure is a magical world we live in

(via sswanmills)

Notes
56354
Posted
11 hours ago

bettycrockerdile:

i had a pun about insanity but then i lost it

(Source: illuminationiichan, via starsglowforyou)

Notes
124417
Posted
11 hours ago

tramampoline:

queergh0st:

how come you can name your kid Lily or Rose and that’s totally acceptable but you trying calling em Baby’s Breath and everyone flips

image

(via ultravioletfireflies)

Notes
14927
Posted
11 hours ago

snydergurl:

"…it was a moment of supreme."
NANO MUGEN FES. 2014 Report ~Owl City~ [x]
(google translate)

(via ultravioletfireflies)

Notes
203
Posted
11 hours ago

trust:

i think the only thing ill ever be proud of is one of my selfies being used as a emo porn site advertisement 

image

(via sarcastic-snowflake)

Notes
173439
Posted
23 hours ago
pridefulvanity:

In today’s episode of uselessly gendered items - ear plugs for women. Because you can’t stick a piece of plastic in your ear unless it’s pink and the box has a flower on it. 

pridefulvanity:

In today’s episode of uselessly gendered items - ear plugs for women. Because you can’t stick a piece of plastic in your ear unless it’s pink and the box has a flower on it. 

(via sarcastic-snowflake)

Notes
6236
Posted
23 hours ago
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