hey there. welcome to my blog. i'm Claire and i'm 16. i'm a positive person. i love owl city and all time low but the majority of the stuff on here is ridiculous shit that i find funny. hopefully you find it funny too. enjoy your stay.
Luigi

condom:

"what’s your dream boyfriend like" Well mostly a dream

(via zackisontumblr)

Notes
56252
Posted
39 minutes ago

thealphapigeon:

-annoying:

you know my name not my

Overwhelming desire to become a pigeon. Words cannot express my dire need to have beautiful grey feathers and glorious wings so that I may fly and feast upon dropped hotdogs and breadcrumbs.

(via twoyardsofcord)

Notes
76815
Posted
41 minutes ago

amydoesthings:

cumslayer:

cumslayer:

So I went on a date today and we went to a nice restaurant before going to the movies and I ordered the “iced grape popsicles” for dessert because I love grape Popsicles so why not right?…..so the waiter brings out the “iced grape popsicles” aND THEY WERE LITERALLY 3 FROZEN GRAPES ON STICKS…..I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE OFFENDED IN MY LIFE…SINCE WHEN ARE 3 FUCKING FROZEN GRAPES IN A FUCKING VASE AN ACCEPTABLE SINGLE DESSERT ORDER..ITS NOT EVEN FROZEN GRAPE JUICE OR SOMETHING ITS LITERALLY JUST A 0.02$ GRAPE THAT WAS PUT ON A STICK THEN FROZEN…LIKE SOMEONE ACTUALLY WROTE THIS DOWN ON THE MENU THINKING “OH YEAH PEOPLE FUCKING LOVE COLD GRAPES” AND SOME OTHER ASSHAT SAID “BRAH. HEAR ME OUT, HOW ABOUT WE PUT THEM ON STICKS AND SERVE THEM IN A VASE WITH NOTHING ELSE” LIKE YOU COULDNT EVEN SERVE IT WITH A FUCKING SECOND FRUIT OR EVEN FUCKING LEAVES OR WHATEVER… IM SO MAD. FUCKING FROZEN GRAPES ON A STICK.

AND THEY WERENT EVEN SEEDLESS GRAPES…..

THAT LAST COMMENT IS WHAT DID IT. HOW DARE THEY

(via nearlyer)

Notes
60053
Posted
41 minutes ago
princeburrito:

jandillmann:

Knit one row a day for a year, matching the yarn color to the color of the sky that day.


if there’s anything the “Do you love the Color of the Sky” post taught me, is that there are waaaaaay more colors than that.

princeburrito:

jandillmann:

Knit one row a day for a year, matching the yarn color to the color of the sky that day.

if there’s anything the “Do you love the Color of the Sky” post taught me, is that there are waaaaaay more colors than that.

(via unofficialashley)

Notes
55828
Posted
48 minutes ago

17yr:

whenever u r sad just say “nyoom” whenever u walk around a corner it will make u feel better 100% trust me i am a doctor

(via exiledqueen)

Notes
138933
Posted
53 minutes ago

rnicrophone:

bombing:

cop: who the hell ordered all these pizzas

me: you said i got one phone call

image

(via zackisontumblr)

Notes
295640
Posted
53 minutes ago

davidisbeyonce:

You want a nose job? Sounds a little kinky but ill give it a go

(via zackisontumblr)

Notes
8659
Posted
54 minutes ago

raidoucoolzunoha:

*blows kiss down to the ground (for the skeletons)*

(via standardgaydad)

Notes
22509
Posted
13 hours ago
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